Sunday, October 10, 2004

Insomniac Sloth

Back to the Outer Banks... Monday, September 27th: Well it's five o'clock in the morning and I can't fucking sleep. I only even tried to go to bed a few hours ago. It's not like I'm not tired either. I guess I have insomnia. Hmph. Took almost a week to put a name tag on it. Last night we went to the Jolly Roger for dinner, which is this funny, extravagant, middle-America-type place with shiny Christmas ornaments hanging from every inch of the ceiling. They sustained heavy damage during Hurricane Isabel last year and had to do a lot of rebuilding but I'm happy to report that they're back in business and haven't lost the spirit of Christmas. All year. After dinner we all meandered into the karaoke bar that comprises the other half of the Jolly Roger for some redneck-watching and mullet-spotting. We discovered the place two years ago when, upon leaving the restaurant, we were lured like the sailors of Odysseus by the sound of haunting, beautiful music. Actually it was John Mellencamp sung off key and we were like, what the fuck is that? Upon investigation we found a whole nother room to the place which featured a stage and upon the stage a dude with a white polo shirt, acid-washed jeans, white high-tops and a mullet singing "Cherry Bomb" like his life depended on it. It was both stunning and thrilling. My grandmother was with us at the time and let's just say that the dual concepts of mullets and karaoke required extensive explanation. Trust me, if you were 85 years old and had no point of reference for that kind of cultural pathos, you'd be baffled too. So anyway, we were in the karaoke bar last night rocking' and boppin' to some dude singing "Paint it Black" by the Stones. He was actually pretty good. He had clearly been practicing. But he had perhaps practiced a bit too much, was perhaps a bit too red-hot, if you will, because toward the end of the song, the power in the restaurant went out. He was that good.We were plunged into literal and figurative darkness. It was a bleak moment, after about 10 minutes of general power-outage mayhem, when we realized that there would be no more redneck karaoke that night. We cursed our ill luck and made for the exit by way of the emergency lights. Later... This morning's sunrise was the best so far. This happens every time - I'm pissed that I can't sleep and then I catch the sunrise and I'm like, wow, that was cool. There were some interesting things on the beach this morning. A veritable blizzard of sand crabs none too happy about my intrusion and a glass jar with some critters stuck to it - what were those? The way they stuck out their feathery appendages made me think of barnacles but they didn't look like any barnacles I'd ever seen. I rolled the jar back into the surf because, yeah, it used to be a bit of pollution but now it's a critter abode. There is also a dead turtle on the beach. A big one. Someone spray painted it pink. I'm not even really sure what else to say about that except that I did wonder if there was a plastic bag in its stomach. Public Service Announcement: sea turtles eat jellyfish. Know what looks a lot like a jellyfish? A plastic bag. When a sea turtle accidentally eats on of these, it dies. It happens all the time, so if you see a plastic bag on the beach please pick it up and throw it away. Thanks!