Monday, November 08, 2004

Sloth Fur Flyin'

Sunflower (again). Sorry, they make me feel hopeful. Ah, good old Slothville. Home sweet home. I had a peaceful, quiet "vacation," even if it did reek somewhat of desperate isolation. It was a total media blackout - no blog, no NPR, no newspaper, no television, no nothing. I worked on my apartment, went on a couple of dates, attended a wine tasting and bought a spectacular mixed case of wine. It was all very soothing. But now I'm back. "Hee-hee. I can't wait until you break out the death on those motherfuckers." -el Dastardo As Lovisa would say, oh, it is brought-en. Before we return to our regularly scheduled programming, I have a few things to say to the people who left impassioned (and sometimes lunatic) comments on my last post. First of all, to the conservative blowhards who stopped by to leave their poison pills in my comments thread, all I can say is - whatever the fuck!! Nobody cares about your toxic attitude so buh-bye. To those conservatives who stopped by to talk about why they voted for Bush (as opposed to mooning me and giving me the finger) all I can say is - thank you for voicing your opinion, I disagree with virtually everything you believe in, but you're welcome to come here and state your case if you want to with no sarcasm or personal slight from me (unless you're a bigot, but we'll get to that in a minute). To those republicans who simply stopped by to say hi and check in and give me a friendly punch on the arm, I want to say a very sincere thank you for being gentle and treating me with kid gloves when you knew I needed it. Thank you Jack and Jay for being true citizens of Slothville and for respecting my upsetitude when it was at its worst (oh, but Jay, honey, lay off the Daz will ya? Everyone should be so lucky to have a friend like him.). And thank you to everyone else who felt what I felt and offered condolences. Last Wednesday was a dark day indeed. Now then. To the person who had the fucking goddamn nerve to walk her punk ass into MY town and accuse me of having a pity party because I wanted to take a few days off, I have this to say: the next time you want to accuse me of trying to make people feel sorry for me, I suggest you take a good hard look at the shit you post on your own blog. Because let me tell you, that complaint is pretty fucking rich coming from you. Don't you ever - don't you fucking EVER come over here and tell me that my concern and love for my country is nothing more than hurt pride. Don't you fucking EVER come over here and call me a quitter for taking time off to decompress. I don't know what the fuck is the matter with you, but if you want to act like a callous, hypocritical bitch, do it on your own time. Oh, you're not going to beg me to be your friend? Sorry to break this to you, sweetie, but I don't consider that much of a threat. To those of you who were insulted when I mentioned bigotry, I have this to say: if you oppose gay marriage, you are a bigot. There's no getting around it. Doesn't feel good to hear that, does it? Know what else doesn't feel good? Having your lifestyle compared to bestiality and child molestation. Having a swaggering prick in the White House who wants to make damn sure you never forget that in this country you are nothing more than a pervert and a second-class citizen. Being told that your happiness and equality is the mechanism that will destroy the fabric of our society. Nope, that stuff doesn't feel good at all. Hey, if you oppose gay marriage, I'm sorry you're such a bigoted, intolerant person. But I'm not sorry for pointing it out. And all the whiny, hand-wringing, PC sissies who want me to be nice to everybody and not talk about peoples' sick, stupid prejudices for fear of offending them, need to grow a fucking spine and get out of my fucking face. You are pointing your finger at the wrong person and if you want to keep that finger you had better get your preachy, condescending attitude out of my grill and stick it back up your uptight ass where it belongs. You want to bite your nails and tip-toe around and worry about insulting people who are entirely dedicated to implicitly insulting you and everyone you love, go right ahead. But don't take the fucking moral high road with me. Subjugating your opinion out of fear of what other people might think of you doesn't make you better than me. It makes you weaker than me. If what you're most worried about is how the right perceives the left, as opposed to what the Bush Administration is doing to hurt the citizens of this country, then I feel sorry for you, you sad sack of shit. How's that for condescension? And...my work here is done. Now back to the permanent party that is Slothville. And folks, from now on, when non-citizens try to start a shitstorm in our town, let's have a big ol' belly laugh at their expense.

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