Monday, October 17, 2005

Monday Minis

I took this odd (read: loser) picture of myself when I got to work this morning to illustrate the fact that..... IT IS HAT WEATHER!!!!!!! Weeeeeeee!!!!!!!! I love the fall!! I am wearing my long leather jacket and my new hat with, though you can't see it in this photo, FUZZY POM-POM on top!! I bought the hat in a consignment shop in August when it was about twelve-hundred degrees outside and my mother totally made fun of me for buying it. And how many degrees is it outside now? Hmm?? Fifty!! That's right!! Ha!! Ok, so a couple things. First, thanks for all the well-wishes. My near-death exhaustion was, as it turned out, hormonal. I went home early, fell asleep at three in the afternoon and thankfully woke up when I was only half-way across the River Styx, with the worst.cramps.ever. Second, see that iPod thing over there in the sidebar? That is totally for real, people. It's a pyramid scheme where you get people to sign up for a thing and the referral counts as points for you. Get enough points and I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING, you will get an iPod. I have proof in the form of someone I know who, I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING, got an iPod this way. My mini just died on me and, as I explained to someone who I can't remember now, I am merely a husk of my former self without it. I signed up for the Blockbuster movie rental thingamabob, rented the entire first season of "Lost" which I haven't seen (no spoilers, please) and after I watch it I'm going to cancel my subscription because, duh! I already have Netflix like everyone else in the free world! Third, I just ate a Krispy Kreme doughnut so expect Hell to freeze over any minute now. Fourth, I did NOT go bowling because one of our bowling partners woke up with swollen eye a la Ahnold Schwarzenegger in "Total Recall." No depth perception = no bowling. Personally, I suspect that they just didn't feel like going anywhere on a crispy Sunday on which the wind was blowing so hard that branches were flying off of trees and babies and kittens were being sucked up into the atmosphere and, really, who can blame them? A WIND ADVISORY?? For the city?? I stayed in bed and read a trashy murder mystery all day. So far the chief medical examiner's ex-boyfriend is my main suspect, but that's all I'll say. That's it! Now go get me an iPod. IN FACT, if you sign up for something and give me my iPod points, I'll send you a free 5x7 of any of the photos in the Slothville gallery. It's called INCENTIVE, people! Make it happen!!